This challenge hearkens back to those courting days when we couldn't get enough of each other. When we hung out and had nothing to do because we cleared out our (then separate) lives or a night or a week or a weekend...either in town or off on a trip. We had the time and the ease of mind to wake up to morning sex or have sex at some random time in the middle of the day and still had the time, energy and desire to do it again later that night.
We have just spent the last 2 days in a bar watching basketball, as we do this time every year. After all that beer, we're ready to relax and spend a couple of days kicking back relaxing. With the kids out of town, we had that opportunity. I expected to wake up to morning sex this morning, but she was up and out before me. We both got up and had coffee, then went back to bed before the games tipped (what a woman!) for an energetic romp.
After a long day of watching basketball, we got an invitation to go out with some friends, which we did. We had a good time, but the downside is that we were pretty tired from our long weekend. When we got home after a few drinks we were more worn down than turned on. Even though we got home late (technically on Sunday morning, but who's counting), we ran through the finish line and had a quick, but satisfying roll in the hay.
Monday, March 21, 2011
Sunday, March 13, 2011
Week 10--Kama Sutra Positions
One of my favorite things about our sex life is that we play in so many positions. Sure, we have 4 or 5 "go to" positions that we use every week, but we frequently, and quite spontaneously, end up in some fun positions. Even better, we move between them smoothly and with ease so we can have a little more fun without it being cumbersome. So, when I drew our card this week, wifey's first though was, "what were we thinking when we put that in?" Not in a bad way, but in a we-already-do-all-this way.
I started my research earlier this week and soon discovered that we really do most of this stuff. We've at least dabbled in most of the easy- to moderate-difficulty positions. Since the spirit of the challenge is to try new stuff, I checked out a couple of good sites that were illustrated (like Jija Sali) looking for a few advanced moves to try. I did some more extensive research than that, but I found this site to be the most concise and easy to navigate site and all of the things we tried were from here.
Okay, so here we are. Saturday night after a few drinks and its time to fool around. After some foreplay to get things going, she hops on top to get everything going. After only 2-3 minutes, I was surprised to hear her say, "okay, what are we doing first?" I had a few things in mind, but didn't really have a specific order. Since she was on top, I naturally went for the girl-on-top positions. We had played with "The Lotus" and "The Fusion" in the past and played a bit in those. The former leads beautifully into the latter and they're really good for deep penetration and slow, sensual thrusting with her in control. The down side of "The Fusion" is that you can't touch her as much because your hands are occupied holding your own weight. At this point, its time to go big. We get on the floor and attempt to get into "The Amazon" position. We got there, but it didn't seem quite right...pretty uncomfortable for me and a little stressful on wifey's long, LONG legs. We abandoned that one pretty quickly.
After that experiment, we took an orgasm break--back to some good ol' fashioned, doggystyle shaggin' until she came. From there, with me standing and her face down on the bed, I picked her up by the thighs as we went for "The Wheelbarrow." After the laughter subsided, it felt pretty good, but it turned out to be a lot of awkward stress on her lower back, so we abandoned that one pretty quickly as well. She hopped back into the center of the bed and went went for the coup d' grace: "The Mill Vanes." Unlike the last, this one was not uncomfortable for me, but it requires the penis to angle downward, which could be uncomfortable for some guys. She felt the pressure of my penis pushing on her vaginal-rectal wall and I felt the pressure on the top (read: less sensitive part) of my penis. I'm of slightly above-average length, but despite that, it was easy for it to slip out. Yep...had enough of that, too. We were actually relieved to be done with these positions and get back to what we know and love. They were pretty uncomfortable, and we were happy to finish up in "The Put Under One," aka, "Reverse Cowgirl."
The difficulty was pretty up there, but we managed to get into all of them, even if we didn't sustain it. With the exception of "The Wheelbarrow," none were painful, but the level and/or type of stimulus just didn't do anything for us. So we'll just limit the difficulty and keep doing what we're doing.
I started my research earlier this week and soon discovered that we really do most of this stuff. We've at least dabbled in most of the easy- to moderate-difficulty positions. Since the spirit of the challenge is to try new stuff, I checked out a couple of good sites that were illustrated (like Jija Sali) looking for a few advanced moves to try. I did some more extensive research than that, but I found this site to be the most concise and easy to navigate site and all of the things we tried were from here.
Okay, so here we are. Saturday night after a few drinks and its time to fool around. After some foreplay to get things going, she hops on top to get everything going. After only 2-3 minutes, I was surprised to hear her say, "okay, what are we doing first?" I had a few things in mind, but didn't really have a specific order. Since she was on top, I naturally went for the girl-on-top positions. We had played with "The Lotus" and "The Fusion" in the past and played a bit in those. The former leads beautifully into the latter and they're really good for deep penetration and slow, sensual thrusting with her in control. The down side of "The Fusion" is that you can't touch her as much because your hands are occupied holding your own weight. At this point, its time to go big. We get on the floor and attempt to get into "The Amazon" position. We got there, but it didn't seem quite right...pretty uncomfortable for me and a little stressful on wifey's long, LONG legs. We abandoned that one pretty quickly.
After that experiment, we took an orgasm break--back to some good ol' fashioned, doggystyle shaggin' until she came. From there, with me standing and her face down on the bed, I picked her up by the thighs as we went for "The Wheelbarrow." After the laughter subsided, it felt pretty good, but it turned out to be a lot of awkward stress on her lower back, so we abandoned that one pretty quickly as well. She hopped back into the center of the bed and went went for the coup d' grace: "The Mill Vanes." Unlike the last, this one was not uncomfortable for me, but it requires the penis to angle downward, which could be uncomfortable for some guys. She felt the pressure of my penis pushing on her vaginal-rectal wall and I felt the pressure on the top (read: less sensitive part) of my penis. I'm of slightly above-average length, but despite that, it was easy for it to slip out. Yep...had enough of that, too. We were actually relieved to be done with these positions and get back to what we know and love. They were pretty uncomfortable, and we were happy to finish up in "The Put Under One," aka, "Reverse Cowgirl."
The difficulty was pretty up there, but we managed to get into all of them, even if we didn't sustain it. With the exception of "The Wheelbarrow," none were painful, but the level and/or type of stimulus just didn't do anything for us. So we'll just limit the difficulty and keep doing what we're doing.
Sunday, March 6, 2011
Week 9--Anal
Oh, the mother of all sex challenges. This is the challenge that scares wifey the most. Not because she believes that it's evil, but because she's got a hang up about her butt hole. We've got some history here as well. When we were first dating, we tried it when we were on a trip. We went out and had a fun night, got really drunk and came back to the hotel for a sex marathon. We had sex twice (yes, it was that early on) and sometime during the second session we (I?) decided that we should try anal. No preparation. Lube wasn't an issue because she was really, really wet, but she wasn't mentally prepared for it and was, honestly, a little traumatized by it.
Fast forward 7 or 8 years--I'm a much wiser man and she's much more open minded. I made no secret that this should be part of our sex challenge and she was skeptical. I insisted not because I physically enjoyed anal sex (vaginal sex actually feels better to me), but because I think that if she opens her mind to it, it can be the gateway to a whole new level of orgasm for her. Over the last 3 months, I've been talking anal a lot. I bought her a butt plug. She thinks I'm "anal obsessed." But it wasn't until I touched her butt during an orgasm one night that her curiosity started to pique. To my (and probably her) surprise, she started letting me finger her butt during sex...and she enjoyed it. Before our vacation a couple of weeks ago, she told me that the most intense orgasms she has is in doggy style while she rubs her clit...with a finger in her ass! What?! While on vacation we took it to the next level. We were having drunk sex one night and I secretly slipped a second finger in while in reverse cowgirl. She came really hard, but didn't know that I had inserted a second finger. This game turned into "just the tip" as we continue to dabble in anal play working up to being ready to meet this challenge, whenever it would occur. She was even able to cum from just my fingers in her ass.
What I've just described is the most critical step in anal sex: the lead in. In my opinion, preparing her physically is overstated, although its important to take your time and make sure she's physically able to accommodate you. The process of preparing her mentally is really what its all about because when she's relaxed and comfortable, she's going to receive you without pain if you've done any anal play. What it's all about for us is what it's all about for most people: trust. Anal sex is about her trusting you to take her outside of her comfort zone, to spend time giving her proper attention to prepare her and to do something that can either hurt her or give her intense pleasure. Once she trusts you, she relaxes and the doorway to pleasure is open.
So we planned for Saturday night--empty house, nice dinner, a few drinks. We went upstairs later than anticipated. We lit some candles (as much for light as for mood) and put on some music. After a little 69, we started having vaginal sex with a little anal diddling. But things just weren't right for some reason. She was tense and thinking about it. Nothing was relaxed and she was very on edge. We played with the smallest butt plug for a little while, which yielded a pretty big orgasm, but it quickly became clear that going beyond that was not going to happen.
So Saturday came and went without an attempt. We talked a little bit the next day and all she could say was that it "wasn't right." The pressure of a time deadline was too much to allow her to relax. We both want to try again, but we agree that its best to just let it happen, as it has been over the last couple of weeks. As far as the challenge goes, we skate by on a technicality. During our game of "just the tip," I was about 1/3 inside her ass and she got off, so I think that counts. Without the pressure, things will get easier.
Edit: There's more to the story! Read our update here.
Fast forward 7 or 8 years--I'm a much wiser man and she's much more open minded. I made no secret that this should be part of our sex challenge and she was skeptical. I insisted not because I physically enjoyed anal sex (vaginal sex actually feels better to me), but because I think that if she opens her mind to it, it can be the gateway to a whole new level of orgasm for her. Over the last 3 months, I've been talking anal a lot. I bought her a butt plug. She thinks I'm "anal obsessed." But it wasn't until I touched her butt during an orgasm one night that her curiosity started to pique. To my (and probably her) surprise, she started letting me finger her butt during sex...and she enjoyed it. Before our vacation a couple of weeks ago, she told me that the most intense orgasms she has is in doggy style while she rubs her clit...with a finger in her ass! What?! While on vacation we took it to the next level. We were having drunk sex one night and I secretly slipped a second finger in while in reverse cowgirl. She came really hard, but didn't know that I had inserted a second finger. This game turned into "just the tip" as we continue to dabble in anal play working up to being ready to meet this challenge, whenever it would occur. She was even able to cum from just my fingers in her ass.
What I've just described is the most critical step in anal sex: the lead in. In my opinion, preparing her physically is overstated, although its important to take your time and make sure she's physically able to accommodate you. The process of preparing her mentally is really what its all about because when she's relaxed and comfortable, she's going to receive you without pain if you've done any anal play. What it's all about for us is what it's all about for most people: trust. Anal sex is about her trusting you to take her outside of her comfort zone, to spend time giving her proper attention to prepare her and to do something that can either hurt her or give her intense pleasure. Once she trusts you, she relaxes and the doorway to pleasure is open.
So we planned for Saturday night--empty house, nice dinner, a few drinks. We went upstairs later than anticipated. We lit some candles (as much for light as for mood) and put on some music. After a little 69, we started having vaginal sex with a little anal diddling. But things just weren't right for some reason. She was tense and thinking about it. Nothing was relaxed and she was very on edge. We played with the smallest butt plug for a little while, which yielded a pretty big orgasm, but it quickly became clear that going beyond that was not going to happen.
So Saturday came and went without an attempt. We talked a little bit the next day and all she could say was that it "wasn't right." The pressure of a time deadline was too much to allow her to relax. We both want to try again, but we agree that its best to just let it happen, as it has been over the last couple of weeks. As far as the challenge goes, we skate by on a technicality. During our game of "just the tip," I was about 1/3 inside her ass and she got off, so I think that counts. Without the pressure, things will get easier.
Edit: There's more to the story! Read our update here.
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